It's hard to tell our bad luck from our good luck sometimes. And most of us have wept copious tears over someone or something when if we'd understood the situation better we might have celebrated our good fortune instead. - Merle Shain
Before the fog had been burned off by the sun, I was driving home from swim practice this morning, grinning ear to ear. I think maybe even a chuckle escaped.
This is the first week that Coach Aaron has combined us masters swimmers with his fish (ie - age groupers). This means that we old folk are getting shown up by tots. And practice is now 75 minutes rather than 60. Tuesday, we did 3500 yards and today, it was 4250. And Aaron keeps putting me in a lane that is sure to challenge me. And each day, I step up to the challenge. Some days, I'm victorious. Other days, I'm flailing.
But that's not why I was smiling.
I was smiling because, well... four months ago, I was so consumed with anger and confusion that I couldn't get through an entire hour practice without shedding a tear of frustration or fear. And now, I can't make it through warm-up without laughing. Obnoxiously loud.
And I'm not sure when this conversion occurred, but I suppose it's like this corporate merger we're going through at work. One day you wake up, and new company/policy/program is all there is and old company/policy/program is but a memory. But when that new company first starts to come in and implement change, it's very difficult. and painful. and we all resist. Until one day, we surrender. And then we find that new company's way of doing things is likely more innovative and productive...or why would they be the surviving entity? And we look back and see it was all for the best. And we wonder why we resisted; question whether we caused all that pain ourselves.
And in the end, I suppose it doesn't matter. Because we're smiling all the same.